Monday, November 27, 2006 8:09 PM
100 mg shot, to last two weeks. Day 0: slightly metallic taste for about a half hour after the shot. Day 3: body scent more acrid and intense. After a week's consideration, I seem emotionally calmer and happier since the shot. (For those who know me, you may think that emotionally calmer = comatose. But it ain't so!) I didn't think I was all that stressed out to begin with; I know they say that a lot of folks who start hormone therapy are happier because it resolves some psychological issues for them, but I didn't think that would apply to me.
No 'roid rage, though, and nothing else to speak of, except *maybe* a slightly higher energy level. I'll be more sure of that if I have more than one data point.
In the meantime, I had two medical anxiety dreams about taking T, once about my doctor calling to say T was off the market and that avenue was closed to me (but in real life, later that day she in fact called to say it was available very very cheap!), and the day of the first shot, when I dreamed that I had missed my appointment and would have to wait a long time for another one. I was in some unpleasant institution in that dream, either military or prison (I've been in both in real life and can't recall which sort of unpleasantness it was).
I *never* have medical anxiety dreams. I didn't have them when I couldn't eat for three months; I didn't have them when I had limited mobility for three years because of my foot; but I had them about (not) taking T. Funny how the subconscious can let you know what's really going on.
Then a couple days ago I went to bed ruminating about how, or rather why, some of us have so much privilege to choose to change our bodies, and about adding muscle mass and short cuts and all that sort of second-guessing stuff, and I awoke from a dream of happily doing leg lunges with dumbbells to get stronger. Once again, the subconscious telling me to quit worrying and get on with it.
Guess I will :-)